Fighting more than fire

Every word Dennis Amodio utters reminds him of Ground Zero and the Sept. 11 tragedy.

His voice still carries a rasp from the smoke and dust from digging for weeks into the rubble of the Trade Center and retrieving the remains, mostly body parts, of the victims -- including his best friend, Dennis Mojica.

"They were brutally murdered," Amodio said. "Nobody got closer than I did. I removed my friends. I put my best friend into a body bag.

"The dust is still on my helmet," he said.

Before moving to Port Charlotte in 1997, Amodio had served as a New York City Rescue 1 firefighter and had been one of the first firefighters who dug into the underground rubble of the first terrorist attack on the Twin Towers in 1993.

By Sept. 13, he was on the road, heading to New York with his rescue equipment, ready to help recover his fallen comrades. But the '93 attack on the towers, along with high-rise and other fires he fought did not compare to what he saw when he arrived in New York.

"It was surreal, surreal, that's the only word for it," Amodio said. What he and others experienced, he said, is almost more than any individual can bear. "And I walked away in a month. They still live with it day after day."

New York firefighters are still struggling with the attack. A year later, New York firefighters and other victims are still having memorial services and funerals for those whose bodies were never found.

"We're not ready for the healing part," he said. "We're still dealing with what happened that day."

Among the strongest images of the tragedy that stays with him is not digging into the rubble -- it's the mother of Paddy O'Keefe, one of Amodio's friends whom he recovered.

"I remember being at the funeral home, and this 85-year-old woman hugged and kissed me and thanked me for bringing her son home," Amodio said. "Of all the things that I've done in my life, nothing will replace that woman hugging and kissing me. They got the closure, but hundreds and hundreds of people don't."

Amodio will participate in local commemorative ceremonies for Sept. 11 victims. He wants people to remember that what happened did not just happen to New York City. It was an attack on the nation.

A call for closure

"I'm flying to New York Sept. 10," said Terry Mindykowski.

Mindykowski was a local Red Cross volunteer who was one of the more than 57,000 Red Cross volunteers and staff who assisted with the WTC recovery effort. It was his first trip to the city.

In October, Mindykowski delivered supplies to Ground Zero for three weeks. He made a second trip in February for three weeks.

"The smell ... the smell was like burning metal and burning flesh at the the same time," Mindykowski said. "I spent a lot of time at Ground Zero."

He also made deliveries to the New York landfill where police and other rescue personnel were sifting through the rubble for remains. He saw stacks of flattened fire trucks, ambulances and police cars. He saw a large parking lot where automobiles sat covered with an inch or more of dust. They were the vehicles of victims.

"It hit me pretty hard," Mindykowski said. What hit him hardest was attending a memorial service where the children of fallen firefighters and police wore uniforms like their fathers and mothers wore.

"It was the only day I cried," he said.

While he was volunteering in New York, Mindykowski said his businesses suffered. He owns the Avis agency in Port Charlotte and had to close a shipping store in Nokomis. Since Sept. 11, he's also found himself in the middle of a divorce. It hasn't been easy.

"I am just now starting to come around," Mindykowski said. "When I got back (from New York), I didn't really talk about it."

Going back to New York, Mindykowski said, may give him some of the closure he needs.

Mindykowski also thinks more than flags are needed now. He would rather see people going out and volunteering their time to the Red Cross or some other organization. Mindykowski also said making donations to the local Red Cross chapter might be a better way to commemorate Sept. 11.

Grieving and commemorating

Cora Taylor is a Port Charlotte psychotherapist who went to New York after the disaster for the Red Cross. She was one of the Red Cross volunteers who counseled more than 237,000 survivors and victims' families.

"It gave me the opportunity to do what I was prepared for and created to do," Taylor said, citing her time in New York as one of the most significant experiences in her life. She still can recall the acrid taste in the air from the fallen towers.

"It was a very positive experience for me," Taylor said.

However, airplanes flying low can often make her flinch or her heart race.

Redrawing attention to the Sept. 11 disaster and holding commemorative services might irritate some people, but Taylor said she believes it's necessary. She says that attention may give many people the chance to grieve. The First Alliance Church, which Taylor attends, will be one of the local churches and organizations that will recognize the Sept. 11 anniversary.

"It's very important to talk about the incident," she said. "I think for all of us it was an emotional event."

Taylor plans to close her office. She's not completely sure how she will spend the rest of Sept. 11, but the day and the tragedy will be recognized.

"It's not morbid," she said. "We all lost a sense of security and a sense of safety."

You can e-mail Steve Reilly at reilly@sun-herald.com

By STEVE REILLY
Staff Writer